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Val on this one
She said I'm not her type
Val's straight answer
"You're not my type" is a kind way to say she's not attracted to you, and it describes her, not your value. Take it gracefully in one line, don't argue it, and don't treat one woman's type as a verdict on you.
Maybe you asked her out. Maybe you asked a friend to find out. Either way, the answer came back: "you're sweet, you're just not my type."
That one stings in a specific way, because it sounds permanent and personal.
What she actually means
"Not my type" is the gentlest phrase we have for "I'm not attracted to you." It's softer than "no," and it puts the reason on her taste instead of on you. That's on purpose.
And honestly? It's often more about her than you think. A type is a pattern, sometimes a bad one. I've had friends whose "type" was every guy who hurt them. A type isn't a ranking. It's a preference, and preferences are weird and not fair.
The two internet answers, and the useful one
You'll see "she's not into you, nothing you can do" on one side, and "become her type, change your look, then she'll see you" on the other. The first is correct but cold. The second sends guys into a six-month glow-up for one woman who already said no.
The useful one: if you're getting "not my type" from lots of women, that's worth looking at, your photos, your style, how you come across. If it's one woman, it's just one woman.
How to answer her
In one line, and then drop it.
Texts you can send
fair enough, appreciate you being straight with me
noted, i'll stop flexing my spreadsheet skills then. all good
Never:
- "what IS your type then?"
- "you haven't even gotten to know me."
- Trying to change her mind with a list of what's great about you.
What to actually do with it
Let it land for a day, then take it for exactly what it is. One person's taste. If you're hearing it a lot, Jules can help you work on the part that's in your control: how to look more attractive as a guy.
Questions guys ask
What does it mean when a girl says you\'re not her type?
It is a gentle way of saying she is not attracted to you. It describes her preference, not your overall worth.
Can I change her mind?
Rarely, and arguing usually makes it worse. Accept it gracefully. If you hear it often, look at the things you control, like style and photos.
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