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Val on this one
How to fix a dry texting conversation
"lol." "yeah." "nice." You're getting one word answers and the chat feels like pulling teeth. Before you give up or start sending memes in a panic, let's figure out what happened.
Why it went dry
- It turned into an interview. Question, answer, question, answer. Boring for both of you.
- It's been going too long. Texting with no plan gets stale. You've used up the small talk.
- She's busy. Real life happens. Work week, family stuff, a bad day.
- She's losing interest. It happens, and you can't text your way out of it.
Don't do these
- Don't ask "why are you so dry?" Nothing kills it faster.
- Don't send three more questions hoping one sticks.
- Don't match her energy with your own one word answers out of spite.
What to send
A pattern break. Something that has nothing to do with the dead thread. A funny thing that happened, a photo of something weird, a bold opinion, or a callback to a joke from earlier when it was going well. Then, if it picks back up, skip the small talk and ask her out.
Texts you can send
unrelated but a guy at my gym just did a full workout in jeans and i have so many questions
still thinking about your theory that all golden retrievers are secretly the same dog
ok texting is not doing us justice. drinks thursday, you can tell me in person
totally get it. lets pick this up when you come up for air
A woman's read
When I go dry on a guy, it's usually one of two things. Either I'm buried this week, or the conversation stopped being fun and I don't know how to say so. A guy who calls me out for being dry makes me feel guilty. A guy who sends something funny and unrelated, or just asks me out, gives me an easy way back in. And if I don't take it, he already did the right thing.
The move
Send one pattern break: a funny thing from your day or a callback to an old joke. If she comes back to life, ask her out. If not, go quiet for a few days.
If it's still dry
One good restart attempt is enough. If she's still giving you nothing, stop texting for a few days. Don't announce it. Just go quiet and live your life. If she comes back, keep it light. If she doesn't, that was your answer. Here's how to keep a conversation going over text next time, and how to ask her out before it ever gets dry.
Questions guys ask
Why is she giving me one word answers?
She might be busy, the conversation might have gotten stale, or she might be losing interest. One restart attempt will usually tell you which.
How do I restart a dead conversation with a girl?
Send something unrelated and fun, or a callback to a joke from earlier. Then move toward a plan.
Should I stop texting her if she is dry?
After one good restart attempt, yes, for a few days. Let her come back if she wants to.
Should I tell her she is being dry?
No. It puts her on the defensive and almost never makes things better.
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